One of the main things you are probably expecting from university is to make ‘friends for life.’ It’s something that the university prospectuses you’ve read and your older siblings/teachers and parents will have told you happens, but what happens to the friends you’ve always had?
Sadly, you will find yourself drifting away from some of them, either because they’re too far away, or you weren’t so close to begin with or simply because everyone has the ability to change and you may find you have less in common than you had previously thought. It’s perfectly normal. I’m not trying to scare you into thinking all your friends will move on, but it’s normal to expect that you won’t return home for the summer to the same friendship group you went away with. This, isn’t such a huge problem because you will find friends at university who share your interests, either through a society you join, or people on your course. This doesn’t mean however, that you will lose everyone.
My best friend moved to Manchester to study whereas I stayed in Leicester to attend DMU, the first few weeks were difficult because we were meeting our course mates and attending freshers week and getting to know new people and learn about ourselves, but we worked hard to maintain our friendship and I thought I could give you a few ideas as to how to keep that BFFL relationship in the works;
- Text- duh! We live in smartphone central in 2014, we can WhatsApp, Kik, iMessage, the possibilities are endless, but seriously, as obvious as it may seem, message one another even if it’s just a simple ‘hey I hope you’re well’ because trust me, if you’ve just left the worlds most boring lecture, or cried into your cornflakes because you want to hug your dog, that text can really bring a smile to your friends face.
- Facetime/Skype- It’s free, like a phonecall, but you get to see the face of a person you’re missing and can make you feel like you’re at home. Facetime when you’re cooking, or procrastinating or even when you’re in the middle of getting your first tattoo, because it means you get to share experiences with your best friend whether they’re studying somewhere as close as Birmingham City or as far as Trinity St David!
- Send Letters- it might seem ancient and you are trying to save every scrap of paper for notes, but there is an unappreciated joy in receiving a letter, if someone cares about you to take the time out to doodle, and write you an inside joke and a portrait of what you’d look like on a pizza throne then keep that person in your life.
- Groupcalls- If you’re missing a large number of your friendship group and have the phone with the technology to process four way or even larger calls then it can be a great thing to do and really make you feel as though you’re in an episode of an American teen sitcom.
- Travel- if you have a little spare cash from your student loan, which you don’t need to use on paying for printing or rent, save it, and book a train or a coach to wherever they are, or somewhere in between, so you can have a great student version of a BFF weekend, see what their student bars have to offer or show a new town what the both of you have learnt from life as a fresher.
Ultimately, just don’t worry if you find yourself not as in touch with the people you once were, because university really will provide you with friends for life, that doesn’t mean you can’t keep your
BFF a part of that too.
(image from www.anihaakien.nl)